READ THIS FIRST! About me/Disclaimer
As with so
many others, I am your typical, geeky, mostly-socially-functional homo sapiens
sapiens. As of this writing, 44. Depending, of course, on your perspective
with regard to age and how long we’ve existed; older if you count time since
conception. Hard to say when I was first
self-aware. But, at any rate, that’s me
- rooting around in the muck that is our multiverse for new questions and the
solutions to them. Continuing to learn
more about myself. Leading others to an understanding
of me, and, hopefully, a better understanding of something else. Anything else. Occasionally, even better, themselves. Smacking a friend’s windshield with a
paintball. Or several. You know how it is.
Also as of
this writing I am:
1/7,251,583,786
OK,
now:
1/7,267,165,236
1/7,269,176,665
So are
you.
For now, I
write how I want. I believe I have a
fairly respectable command of this language but belief is relative. I might’ve had a better vocabulary in grade
school. If the day comes where I see an
opportunity (hopefully) to make a living at this in some form I will be forced to
adapt, which is fine. Good to be
stretched on that medieval rack of others’ criticisms, as long as it pops a
festering vertebra back into place.
That said, my writing style is like my train of thought…all over the place, oft changing tracks, sometimes derailing completely into gravel, trees or maybe a river. Sometimes off of a very high trestle or cliff but imagine the language you might come up with on the way down. The higher the better? I do try to clean up and organize, attempting to make myself as clear a read as possible but I will at times completely suck or not give a fuck. Deal with it. If you don’t wanna, suck it up and read it again anyway. Try to put yourself in my shoes and reflect a bit on how difficult it has been for me to start writing in the first place. Then I wholeheartedly urge you to write for yourself as well. It can be massively therapeutic and you might even surprise yourself. Let’s solve the world’s problems, or at a minimum throw some ideas around and keep the conversation going. Tell a truth. Tell a story. Have some fun.
That said, my writing style is like my train of thought…all over the place, oft changing tracks, sometimes derailing completely into gravel, trees or maybe a river. Sometimes off of a very high trestle or cliff but imagine the language you might come up with on the way down. The higher the better? I do try to clean up and organize, attempting to make myself as clear a read as possible but I will at times completely suck or not give a fuck. Deal with it. If you don’t wanna, suck it up and read it again anyway. Try to put yourself in my shoes and reflect a bit on how difficult it has been for me to start writing in the first place. Then I wholeheartedly urge you to write for yourself as well. It can be massively therapeutic and you might even surprise yourself. Let’s solve the world’s problems, or at a minimum throw some ideas around and keep the conversation going. Tell a truth. Tell a story. Have some fun.
I am
opinionated. I will piss you off. Hell, I piss myself off. I whine, cry, cuss, bitch, argue, froth and
spit. That said, I am usually very
successful in being playful and maintaining my sense of humor. Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who could give a
gravity-defying bout of copulation. Asshole. Wipe that condescending grin off your face or
I’ll bleach you clean. But, you’re
porous, and that could leave a residue…scratch that. Or I could just do that and clean you again
with something intended for that purpose.
That’ll learn ye. Asshole. No, I won’t punch you…that kind of
unproductive violence has no merit whatsoever.
Besides, I’d cut my hand and have bad luck for seven years.
The
occasional delusion is what I allow myself when I am feeling scientisty or philosophery
and believe I’ve struck a neat chord. Not necessarily correct or in but I decent
thought nonetheless, nonethemore. Stewed
in with other veggies of study, opinions, hopefully discussion, those delusions
might become those of grandeur. Heh…
There’s a
thought. Imagine going a year without
ever seeing your own face. Even a week,
for that matter. Hmm.
I could
venture to say I intend to piss everyone
off at times. I know from vast personal experience
that one of the best ways to learn, quickly, is to experience trauma, most of
the time self-imposed; physical, emotional, psychological…trauma. Physical insomuch as only to improve…I’m not
saying making nice parallel lines in your forearm with a box knife is a good
idea. It isn’t. So I might as well try to leave this place a
weee bit better just by breaking things and seeing what is learned; what
grows. I’ve seen some fantastic things
done with broken clay pots.
I’d love it
if someone considered my thoughts as something along the lines of an
intellectual screwdriver in a power outlet.
For the jolt of electricity…not as a negative reinforcer that tells you
not to come back, to be clear. Hmm…I might
need a better metaphor for that.
Along those
lines, I also allow myself to have feelings and show them to myself. As I age I tend to care less about who witnesses
any of my doings should they be proximal during an episode, not unlike many
women breastfeeding. Feel free to suckle
the teat of my public emotional outbursts, small or large. That is perhaps misleading…I am never prone
to ‘in-the-street’ public outbursts, usually just in private writing; this here
is the manifestation of the idea of getting oneself out there. Ability to like never before, so we might as
well.
On that
note, I’ve always said I don't care what
you say or do - be yourself. It is how I
choose to react to you being you that matters. Maybe I will be known for that quote
someday. Probably not, someone has
likely already said exactly that. But
then, with billions having lived and living, there are few original ideas, it
is just luck of the draw as to who gets the credit. I do believe strongly in giving credit where
it is due.
pitch ·AH·chee Just in case you were wondering. ;o)
Keep in mind
I am fully aware all people exhibit a multitude of possible personality
traits. If I say something is
representative of part of me, I am not trying to say I’m the only one, I am
just telling you about the ingredients which make up my own personal recipe of
craziness. ;o)
Generalist. Here’s a note I left myself to write something
about being a generalist. While I don’t
immediately recollect wataf I was thinking at the time I might come back to it
later. Too many options.
As with so
many people, one of the things I am blessed with, cursed with, is seeing the
global relationships between entities and ideas. Immense lengths of dominos…beneficial,
consequential, destructive. I will tend
to repeat myself and link to other articles with some frequency. I’ve also been told attorneys like reading my
writing as I usually have no trouble saying exactly what I mean, and very often
repeating the exact same word many times if it is the best expletive . If I am trying to be purposefully creative
and not get some technical idea across, I’ll dig up a different synapse. Or even open a thesaurus. Thesaurus…Pleistocene parchment?
Presence of
libelous language? I doubt it. I am usually very frank in that everything I
put out there is my own opinion, and I tend to write out everything in a doc on
my puter first and sleep on things for a night or ninety before proofreading
again and posting, so that should filter anything I might get sued for as a
result of an impaired rant.
Random
Rant: I left college because I found
myself paying more for the access to the libraries than anything. I didn’t need to attend some class to learn
something, and it was upsettingly rare we’d have any kind of stimulating
conversation in classes. Maybe that was because my curriculum was
almost all hardcore sciences, and at that time my professors frowned on
debate. They sure frowned on mine. But…I still acquired quite a few years under
my belt…I’d like to think that queued me up for the eventual billionaire’s
success as several friends predicted but money more than sufficient to be
secure was never a motivator. Six
figures was fine but wholly unrewarding, especially considering that the work I
was doing wasn’t exactly conducive to a monumental volume of creativity. Not as I tend to see it at any rate. I had my outlets, but…yeah. We’ve all been there. At least there was ample opportunity for problem
solving and helping people.
In terms of
survival and competition for resources, I tend
to value my own life over yours. I would
expect that you would do the same with yourself but that is your prerogative. I’ll get into the brain stem in another
article. Of course, I do attempt to
adhere to this antiquated, socially-conscious idea of ‘sharing’, but who am I
kidding. All for me and one for me,
right? Anyway…there are obviously those
whom I would give effortlessly my last heartbeat for, but that could easily be
the subject of a completely different article.
And likely will be.
Who I am, of
course, is open to interpretation and opinion.
I will, again, tend to listen
to and value my own opinion above yours but I’ll reserve that right. Keep in mind I said specifically that I ‘tend’
to. For now, anyway. That is not to say foreign opinions of me won’t
be looked at, as when you venture an honest opinion of me as a whole or in some
fragment, I will not pay attention…quite the contrary. I welcome all ideas as I do actually try to
better myself in terms of individual organs, bones and connective tissue in
addition to that funky nonsense that occurs seemingly, mostly, within this
thick skull of mine.
IF you
read. IF you aren’t someone who looks
for TL;DR. Lazy ass. Although…in this day and age, I do the same
thing myself. I love being a lazy ass, I’m
just working to bring it to a comfortable minimum. Kettle, meet Pot.
©Michael Pichahchy 2014
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